December 05, 2020

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48 Ways to Feel Better About Yourself Featured

It is important that you feel good about yourself. More and more scientific evidence points towards a significant link between how you feel about yourself and your overall health and sense of well-being. Scientists have proven that feelings of inferiority have the capacity to pave the way to illness or disease. On the other hand, if you feel good about yourself, have a positive outlook, and maintain an active involvement in life, you’re more likely to be happy and healthy.

Feeling truly good about yourself means loving the person you actually are, inside and out. It takes hard work and some major adjustments to learn to accept yourself and to address the unhappiness in your life. If you want to feel good about yourself, it starts with identifying the thoughts, emotions, and behaviors that might block you from feeling good about yourself. After that, you can work on creating a lifestyle that makes you feel valuable, loved, and fulfilled. If you want to know how to feel good about yourself, follow a few simple steps to be on your way.

 

21 Ways to Feel Good about Yourself

1- Do the right thing.

The bliss of blamelessness. Practice the virtues that are the foundation of any psychological growth or spiritual practice.

2- Tend to the causes of accomplishment.

Do the things that will legitimately earn you success. All you can do is feed the fruit tree; you can’t make it give you an apple. Take initiative, be “ardent, diligent, resolute, and mindful,” and be at peace with whatever happens. As Meher Baba said: “Don’t worry. Be happy. Make efforts.”

3- Love.

Practice lovingkindness for everyone, including (especially?!) neutral and difficult people. Feelings of love neutralize feelings of shame.

4- Be.

Do things that ground you increasingly in a sense of your own beingness, always already awake, benign, and contented. For example, meditate, spend time in nature, cuddle your children (or sweetie), do yoga, etc.

5- Relax “self.”

Take things less personally. Give up trying to perfect yourself; that’s like trying to polish Jell-O.

6- Accept yourself as you are.

You are what you are, and you cannot change how you are in this instant, though you can create the causes that will develop you in the future. But at any moment of now, there is nothing you can do besides accept it and act to improve it. In particular, try to accept the vulnerable or not-so-pretty parts of your self; everyone has these; for example, it is not bad to be anxious, sad, or needy.

7- Accept where you are.

Accept where you are in the four natural, unavoidable stages of learning and getting better at anything: unconscious incompetence, conscious incompetence, conscious competence, unconscious competence. The second stage – conscious incompetence – is the hardest one, and it’s where people are prone to quit, but keep going toward growing competence, which will support your sense of worth.

8- Serve the world.

Donate to charity. Tend to your friends and family (including animal companions). Be nice to strangers.

9- Exercise your capacities.

If you have talents lying fallow, start using them. “The most expensive piece of equipment is the one not making any money.”

10 -Reflect on your accomplishments and good qualities each day.

Perhaps take brief inventory before going to bed each night, answering questions like these: What did I get better at today? How did I act with good character? What have I gotten done? In what ways did I help others?

11-  Be in reality.

Be in reality about the facts of who you are, and what you have done in your life (the good and the bad). See yourself as a mosaic with a hundred tiles, and tell the truth about what is actually there; it’s always mostly good.

12- Be fair.

You would want to be fair in your judgments of others; why do you, another human being like them, deserve any less?

13- Take in the your good.

Take in the evidence of your own contributions, skills, accomplishments, loveableness, value to others. Fill that hole in your heart so that you become less hungry for “narcissistic supplies” over time.

14- Spend more time with people who like you.

Perhaps even identify a kind of “go-to” or support team of key people who are major and credible validators of you, and deepen your involvement with them. Spend less time with people who are neutral, indifferent, or negative toward you. If people are critical, it can help to reflect on the myriad factors that led them to treat you that way, which can put it in context and make it feel less personal. If appropriate – and not just getting sucked into wrestling with the tar baby – stick up for yourself. If appropriate, ask others to stick up for you, too.

15- Ask for appropriate positive feedback.

It is a lot more useful to know what you are doing right than what you are doing wrong, since the latter only tells you that you’re missing the target, not where it is or how to hit it.

16- Create a caring committee.

 Get a sense or image of internal nurturing and encouraging figures, such as the loving eyes of your doting grandmother, a guardian angel, or simply a clear voice of reason in about your good qualities. Build up the realness of those internal “nurturing parent,” “protector,” or “guide” figures, and listen to them more often.

17- Assess criticism honestly.

 Sort criticisms about you into four piles – “not valid,” “valid but to heck with it, I’m not going to change that one,” “not a moral fault but worth putting in correction from now on,” and “deserves a healthy wince of remorse” – take maximum reasonable responsibility for the third and fourth piles, make the appropriate changes sincerely and diligently (perhaps even specific amendments or expiations for serious wrongdoings), and move on.

18- Forgive yourself.

Forgive yourself your past misdeeds and your present faults. This does not mean letting yourself off the hook for them, but means instead not berating or whipping yourself over and over for them. In a way, self-flagellation is a kind of avoidance of responsibility; when we take true responsibility, there is a kind of forgiveness, an honest facing and then a moving on. If you like, write out sentences like, “I forgive myself for ______ .” Or imagine others forgiving you, like the other people involved, or beings who have a powerful meaning to you (e.g., a teacher, Jesus, the Buddha).

19- See the empty nature of both your good qualities and your bad ones.

See the empty nature of both your good qualities and your bad ones. They are all compounded from smaller parts, they’re the result of ten thousand factors (give or take a few), and they arise and disappear interdependently with the whole wide world; therefore, they have no inherent static independent existence. They are simply qualities, some good, some bad. The good ones are worth encouraging, and the bad ones worth discouraging – for the sake of yourself and all beings – but none of them is worth identifying with.

20- Stick up for yourself within yourself.

Talk back to irrational or self-critical thoughts. Classic examples: Comparing yourself to others (especially unfair comparisons); equating the worth of who you are with the success of what you do.

21- Treat yourself as if you matter.

Listen to your innermost hopes and dreams, don’t dash them, don’t rain on that parade, but encourage them in realistic ways. Give yourself empathic attunement – which may have been in short supply when you were a child – for your own feelings, being mindful of them, friendly toward them, and accepting (meditation is great for developing this ability). Let yourself let down sometimes; drop the load, put your feet up, and relax; maybe you need a good cry, for real; build in routine times for rest and respite; take more long baths, long walks, long lovemaking, long board games with the kids, long chats with good friends.

 

27 Ways to Instantly Feel Better When You’re Down

Some people can feel better in a quicker way than others because they’ve found their own remedies to heal the bad feelings.

If you haven’t found yours, these ways will help you instantly feel better and ditch that negative self talk when you’re feeling bad about yourself: 

  1. Listen to the songs you loved when you were in high school or university, this will recall you of the old good times.
  2. Write something. Write down how you feel as a way to express your thoughts if you don’t feel like talking to anyone.
  3. Draw something. Draw anything you want because no one’s going to judge your drawing skills.
  4. Read the postcards or letters your friends or family sent you before, remind yourself there are people who always remember you.
  5. Silently think of a day or moment which you truly enjoyed and try to recapture that very first feeling. Was it the day of your graduation? The moment you traveled with your loved one?
  6. Take out your photo albums and go over your childhood photos.
  7. Cry when you feel like doing so. There’s nothing wrong with crying; cry out all your fear and stress and just face the truth after crying.
  8. Sing loudly like no one can hear you. Do you know that in Japan, people always sing karaoke to relieve stress?
  9. Cook a nice meal for yourself or for your family.
  10. Read your previous diary entries and look at your great memories.
  11. Dress up nicely to feel happier.
  12. Don’t stay in your bed! Get your laptop or a book and sit in a coffee place.
  13. Take a walk outside and feel the fresh air.
  14. Sweat yourself! Go jogging or play some sports.
  15. Pick up the musical instrument you used to play a lot and start to play it.
  16. Tidy up your desk or wardrobe, you’ll feel good that you’re being productive and actually doing something.
  17. Watch some funny videos, sure you can find a lot of them on Youtube.
  18. Eat something you like, be it a chocolate cake, or an ice-cream. Just please yourself with the flavour you like.
  19. Re-read your favorite book and write down the sentences or passages that you love.
  20. Watch a new movie, there must be a movie which you’ve always interested in but had no time to watch it.
  21. Do something nice that no one will notice, say picking up a rubbish in the street and throw it to a trash bin.
  22. Call your best friend and just talk whatever you want! Human beings are social animals after all, connecting with people close to you will make you feel better.
  23. Do voluntary work and help people in need, you’ll feel happy and satisfied.
  24. Get drunk with your close friends at home – a safe place for you to get drunk and get crazy. Let loose and have fun with your very close friends.
  25. Write an email or a note to a friend who you care about.
  26. Get out of your routine life and meet new friends. Get out of your comfort zone! Meeting new people can give you new inspirations in life.
  27. Look into the mirror and smile. Act like today’s already a wonderful day. How we act affects how we feel. It’s difficult to go on feeling sad if you’re trying to smile!
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Last modified on Thursday, 29 October 2020 20:19

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